I Scream at the Top of my Lungs, What's Going On

Well, if this isn't coming along just swimmingly...

Yes, it is very roll-y on the bottom, and no, I don't have any idea how to remedy that, as I have proven before, seeing as BFF's birthday scarf is still very, very curly.

I made a little tiny sample of BFF's scarf so that I could experiment on the rolliness without ruining the actual thing. I blocked it... and nothing happened. So Shelly decided to iron it.

If you'll notice, it is still a little curly, and the stitches look smooshed and have lost all definition and stretchiness. Shelly, however, can't understand why I don't want the actual scarf to suffer the same fate as the poor innocent swatch.

I guess that's why the label specifically specifies not to iron the crappy acrylic. Ooohh.....

I think it's a better idea for the scarf to roll up into itself than it is for it to fall at the hand of Shelly's iron. At least this way I can say, "Oh, BFF, it's supposed to look like that. It's a skinny scarf. And I'm pretty offended that you didn't know that!"

Yes. That is obviously the best solution.

And in other breaking news... Boyfriend is gone for the weekend. And you know what that means! A whole weekend of booze, drugs, and new man meat.

Ew. I tried to make a funny, and it ended up just being gross. I am so not that person. I would clearly make a terrible hippie. My weekend is going to consist of homework, Summertime Tunic, and blowing up football shaped balloons for Super Bowl Party go-ers.

But you know what? That sounds so much better than all the hippie stuff.

Oh, and do you like my new ducks?

I got them on account of they look just like Boyfriend and me. Except for the part where we're not actually ducks, or yellow, or have beaks. And also he doesn't play a guitar yet, and if he did, it would be acoustic because I told him that would be hotter. And also I'm clearly not as good of a hippie as this duck is. This duck is probably wing-deep in LSD. I am elbow-deep in Berroco Comfort DK. I think I got the better end of that deal.

Song of the Day:

"And so I wake in the morning and I step outside and I take a deep breath and I get real high and I scream at the top of my lungs, what's going on?" - 4 Non-Blondes, "What's Up"

You Know the Movie Song

I have never been so overwhelmed in my life.

And no, not because I spent an inordinate of time blowing up an inordinate amout of balloons this weekend. Even though I did.

Boyfriend took me to my real live LYS today.

!!!!!

As I've mentioned here before, I'm not a highway driver. There are too many crazy drivers doing crazy things, and I am just not up for that. I take defensive driving very seriously. As a result, I rock the craft store acrylic.

But I really wanted to make that pretty tank top, and the acrylic and wool that I would have gotten at Michael's would a) be too warm, and b) not hold up very well. It's okay for a scarf or a hat or something that I'm not going to wash every time I use it (not good, but okay), but not for this.

I told Boyfriend, and he took me. He volunteered to take me. I didn't even have to ask him. I have to keep him around.

Of course, the yarn isn't the only reason why I have to keep him around. Just one of them.

So we go there, and we were greeted by this extremely nice woman who was so full of energy that she made her little converted barn seem so much bigger than it really was.

The shop was a barn behind her house, that was every inch of wall space was covered with shelves and shelves of yarn. There was even yarn hanging down from the ceiling. And it was all so pretty.

I showed her the pattern, and she showed me three yarns that would work well with it within five minutes of me walking in the door.

I never would have thought to pick out those yarns on my own. She was so knowledgable, and so friendly, and so helpful, that I want to keep going back there. She even told me that if I ever had a problem with a pattern, I could come and she would help me with it.

I might love her.

And all the yarn. I didn't know yarn like this existed. She had Debbie Bliss, and Berroco, and Manos de Uruguay, and I think some Rowan, but I could be wrong about that. She knew just how much of it I had to buy, too. Including enough for a swatch for gauge.

Then, she took me around and had me feel all of the diffent kinds of yarn. I had no idea that alpaca and merino yarns were soft. Like, really soft. Like, Caron Simply Soft soft. The merino that the craft stores have is kind of scratchy, and I'm not even sure they have any alpaca.

I am a changed knitter. I have an LYS.

This is what I bought:

Isn't it pretty?!?!?!?!

As soon as I finish BFF's birthday scarf (which is almost done), I'm going to start working on the top until I find a coupon to Michael's so that I can buy yarn for my grandpa's hat.

I still don't know what I'm going to do about blocking the scarf, because it's so so curly on the edges, but I don't want to wet it or steam it and have the teal and purple bleed into the grey. Sounds like a job for Vogue Knitting!!!

And in college news, I talked to Shelly about the scholarship that I got to Second Choice, and about how I didn't want to just throw it away. But she thinks that, for what I want to do, Dream School is really the only place for me, and that she'd hate to see me not go there.

It's good to know that Shelly and Pharmacy Pete won't get mad if I have to take out loans that I'll have to pay back until I'm dead.

If I don't go to Dream School, I'm so afraid that I'll never be able to get published. And if I can't published, how can I save the world? Writing is the only thing I know how to do that can influence and inspire people. I want to help people, and save them in anyway that I can. I want to inspire them to do great things, and I want to save the world from all of the hate and crap that goes on.

I have a while to decide, anyway. But I think I know what I'm doing.

I bet my LYS lady would know what to tell me.

Song of the day:

"Juliet, when we made love you used to cry. You said, 'I love you like the stars above, I'll love you till I die'. There's a place for us, you know the movie song. When you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?" - Dire Straits, "Romeo and Juliet"

Concrete All Around

So.... guess how many people came into to my balloon gig on Monday? Go on, guess.

That's right! Five. Maybe. If that. And two of them were returning things. I guess people just aren't devoted enough to party planning to risk their lives driving in a not-even-that-bad-anymore-the-roads-are-mostly-cleaned-up snow storm. Go figure.

I did get to stock Easter stuff, though. And I will say this - there is a lot of crap you can buy to make your Easter Egg Hunt super special. For instance, a can of white spray paint that they jack up the price on because they call it "Easter Egg Hunt Starting Line Paint." Or something to that idiotic effect.

But at any rate, that means spring is coming soon, and I am super glad. How in love am I with this? And it's a free pattern, which just about rocks my socks right off my feet. Speaking of which, I keep meaning to try to make socks. I just have too many projects going right now. Scarves take up a crap load of time!!!!! I keep saying I'm not going to make anymore, and then I do. Inevitably. Damn my lack of self-restraint.

Song of the Day:
"Now I've drunk a lot of wine and Im feeling fine, got to race some cat to bed. Oh is there concrete all around, or is it in my head." - Mott the Hoople, "All the Young Dudes"

Let the Cold Winds Blow

Snow day!!!! And I have to say, looking out and seeing all of this snow, it's a little bit of a relief. Last week, it was in the 50s and 60s all week, and even though it was nice not having to wear a down coat whenever I wanted to check the mail, it had me worried about global warming. Marshmallow was worried to, but he does have an invested interest, being a polar bear and all.

Plus I missed my scarf.

We found out last night that there was no school today when Shelly, Pharmacy Pete and I were watching Jon and Kate Plus Eight on TLC (I get exhausted just watching that show. God bless them for their patience), and Shelly flipped over to our local public access station, where they had posted a notice about it.

Even though I have to go into the party store later on (in order to serve the zero people who are going to come in for all their party and balloon needs. Oh, and also to make sure that the candy department doesn't fall into a state of total and complete disarray, as it is apt to do when I, as the candy department specialist, am not around.), I kind of wanted to start working on writing something. Anything. An outline for a new book, or a story for my school's lit mag, anything. I'm jonesing for some good fiction. But instead, I have a crap load of other stuff to get done. Like finish BFF's scarf for her birthday, which is in the beginning of February, and it's already the middle of January (which, oh by the way, how did that happen?). Or spend some quality time with College Board searching for scholarships. Or read the two Ayn Rand books that Shelly got me that, if I read them and write essays about them, I could win some pretty decent scholarships. The only problem is that, together, they're almost two thousand pages long, and the print is so small that it's almost impossible to read. But if it means I can afford Dream College, then it's worth it. Hopefully.

I'm probably just going to end up watching Clark and Michael until work anyway. I'm very productive.

Song of the Day:
"If you were the winter, I know I'd be the snow, just as long as you were with me, let the cold winds blow." - Barry Louis Polisar, "All I Want is You"

Thoughts that Drift Away

Good news on the party store gig! I am now the official candy department specialist.

Please hold your applause. I am not done and it is distracting.

I went into work yesterday, and my manager said, "Have I got a job for you!" To which I was all, "Super!" Because nothing good ever comes from that statement. In fact, it usually involves me climbing a ladder, or doing something equally capable of resulting in injury to my clumsy self.

But all she did was hand me a clipboard with a plan-o-gram (a diagram showing exactly which products go exactly where in a five foot section of shelves, for all of you minions who are not candy department specialists. Though I am told by Shelly that all retail stores use plan-o-grams. Silly Shelly. How does she not know that I, as the lone candy department specialist at my beloved balloon store, am the only one in the world capable of understanding and utilizing a plan-o-gram?), and told me to fix the candy section, as it was in complete disarray.

And, in fact, the six five-foot sections of candy were all disasters. There was candy there that did not belong there, candy that was supposed to be there wasn't, it was all just messy.

I got the impression that she thought that the job was going to be big and long and difficult by the way she kept looking at me nervously as she told me what I was supposed to be doing, as though I was going to yell at her for suggesting that I perform such a ridiculous and impossible task. But it wasn't that bad at all. I cleaned and organized the whole thing, found the missing candy, and found homes for the extra candy, while all the while I was making balloons and ringing up customers while our credit card satellites were down, making it so that it took twice as long to ring up customers paying with cards.

Basically, it wasn't a big deal. At least not for a candy department specialist like myself.

But my manager was all like, "Susan, this looks so neat. You did a really good job today." Then she told me that candy was going to be my department from now on, which means that, on top of the cashiering and balloon-making and stocking and general cleaning that I was already doing, it's my responsibility to make sure that the candy stays clean and organized.

I'm pretty sure that this means I make an extra 25 cents an hour, but, more importantly, it means that I get to attach a flag to my name tag that says "DEPARTMENT SPECIALIST."

AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

It made my day.

And my weekend.

And most likely all of next week.

In other recent news, Clark and Michael is my new favorite thing. I love Michael Cera. He's so subtly funny that he's ten times more hilarious than he would be if he was loud.

Song of the day:
"Am I alive or thoughts that drift away? Does summer come for everyone? Can humans do as prophets say?" - Primitive Radio Gods, "Standing Outside a Broken Phonebooth with Money in my Hand"

I'm Pushing an Elephant Up the Stairs

Seeing as this blog is one-fourth knitting, I think I should brief you on my knitting endeavors.

On my 13th or 14th birthday, my grandparents (on Pharmacy Pete's side) gave me a teach-youself-to-knit kit. With a little help from Shelly and my grandma on her side of the family, I learned the basic cast on, knit, purl, and bind off. I then proceeded to lose all interest in the craft until a few months ago, which, for the record, was years later.

And here is what I've done so far...

(Turn your head to see this picture please. Or, don't, I guess. It's not that great of a picture.)

This is the Alexi scarf from Berroco. I made it with Caron Simply Soft, which is only acrylic, but I love it with all of my heart because it is so soft, and so pretty, and so in my inflating-balloons-for-a-career budget. I don't have a LYS, mostly because getting to the one closest to me would require driving on the highway, which I'm not about to do. So, I rely heavily on Michael's and A.C. Moore, especially when they put 40% off coupons in the paper.

Don't judge.

Between my knitting and my coupons, I could swear I'm an 80 year old trapped in a high schooler's body. Which, when you think about it, is a little gross, but if I was 80, that's just the kind of situation I would like to be in.

Anyway, upon seeing my lovely, soft, pink scarf, Shelly went out to A.C. Moore and picked up some more Simply Soft for this lovely gem....

This is the Ticuna scarf from Berroco.

Shelly doesn't want her face to appear in this blog. It's not like it's gross and disfigured or anything, she just hates pictures.

And then I was bored with scarves. I saw a girl come into my balloon-filled workplace wearing the cutest hat, that I loved very much. I didn't get to ask her where she got it from, though, as she was not super friendly (how can you not be happy in a party store? Where I am working and therefore providing you with astounding customer service????). I couldn't find it in any of the stupid stores in the stupid mall of this stupid city, so I found a pattern for the closest thing I could find, which I might love even more than the original.

LE SLOUCH!!!!

Boyfriend's sister liked it so much that I made her one too, only in cream. It's just Lion's Brand Wool, and it takes less than a skein and about two days plus blocking time to make it.

Note the random lines of stockinette running through what is supposed to be seed stitch. But, in all fairness, it was my first time knitting on a round, and I wasn't even using dp's like I was supposed to. Boyfriend gave me the Boye set of circular needles that has every size imaginable for my birthday, and I didn't want to go out and spend the money on something I already had that would do the job exactly the same way. However, that resulted in the holes in the top that had to be sewn up after blocking. Good job Susan. Top notch.

Boyfriend's really good at gifts like that. For instance, this Christmas? Panini maker.

And also, that stud-muffin of a teddy bear is my buddy Marshmallow. As he is a boy bear, he doesn't appreciate me using him as a model for my girl hat. He agreed, however, because he wants to spread the word that he is very upset that his polar bear relatives are dying because the polar ice caps are melting. His relatives have no where to sit and stop swimming, so they drown. On that note, please recycle and stop buying big boats of cars. Marshmallow will thank you for it.

Next up is a hat for my grandfather, a scarf for my BFF's birthday, a scarf for my grandmother, a hat for my other grandmother, maybe that cute new clutch from Knitty, yadda yadda yadda...

And maybe I should think about improving my photography skills. But, at this point, I really do not need another interest. A girl can only have so many before she begins to neglect her prior commitments like, oh you know, school... Boyfriend... sleeping. Nothing too important though.

Song of the day:
"I'm pushing an elephant up the stairs. I'm tossing up punchlines that were never there. Over my shoulder a piano falls, crashing to the ground." -R.E.M., "The Great Beyond"